I find myself struggling to find inspiration this week. I can sit here and conjure up all sorts of excuses and blame all sorts of people and situations, but I know that I create my own reality.
If I am struggling, it’s because I’m being sloppy in my thinking
and not applying my focus on positive thoughts.
Remember when I said that it takes effort and practice to live a deliberate life? Well, it really does. Living by default really sucks, and when you get a taste of what living a deliberate life feels like, catching yourself back in your old pattern of default living sucks even more.
I should really take my own advice though. I shouldn’t be so hard on myself.
It’s only been a few days; not a month, or a year. Nothing has really gone wrong here. The fact that I am sitting here, allowing myself to feel this way, means that I am on my way back to remembering what my true state of being is (which is the happy, buoyant person that I usually am).
When we don’t feel right, when we feel “off” – and it doesn’t even have to be as extreme as the example I used the other day – if we just give ourselves the gift of a little bit of time for introspection, a little time to reflect, we can begin to feel better immediately.
We live in a society that promotes the “treadmill lifestyle”, as I call it. You get up in the morning, and you get on your treadmill and you start running, and rushing, and trying to get as much done as possible before your time runs out for the day. But what we often don’t realize is that the treadmill isn’t leading us anywhere. It isn’t giving us anything except a greater feeling of exhaustion.
Getting stuff done isn’t a sign of success.
So, I’m going to take my own advice, and give myself a break; literally, and figuratively.
The meme I’ve posted above inspired me today because I forget, sometimes, that the destination that we are working towards, whatever it may be – a better job, a career that we’re passionate about, a relationship, a pile of money, a new car – is only a small part of the happiness that we are seeking. What’s the point of getting something that we want if we’re not happy in the process of getting it? If you’re grumpy all the time, and by some stroke of luck you get that dream job, you’re actually not going to appreciate it. You’ll inevitably find something wrong about it and go back to being grumpy.
Doesn’t it feel better to work towards something, to enjoy the process, to meet all kinds of wonderful people and encounter all kinds of fun things, on the way to getting whatever it is you’re trying to get to? Can you feel the difference now, just in reading these words? I sure can.
I know it’s a cliché to use the phrase “It’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey”, but if you allow yourself to take a few moments to slow it down, and really think about it, it begins to resonate.
And now I’ve just realized why I was struggling and feeling grumpy these last couple of days. I hadn’t allowed myself that precious time to sit, and think, and write. Scott Dinsmore had the right idea when he said that nothing is more powerful, and life changing, than to adopt a daily writing habit.
You should try it!
Really! In whatever format you choose, whether it’s a journal, just opening up your word processor, or starting a blog yourself. Writing is a truly excellent way to allow yourself that time for introspection.
Let’s talk a little bit about introspection
Introspection is so important on the journey to getting to whatever makes you happy. Allowing yourself to sit down and have a real, honest conversation with yourself (no, we won’t think you’re crazy, and we won’t lock you up) is, to me, the most important part of the journey.
Introspection means getting to know yourself. It means being honest with yourself, with where you are, and with how you feel. And one of the best ways of doing that is to start writing.
Sometimes, just putting pen to paper and just letting the words flow out, you end up with a real sense of relief from all the stuff that you might not have even known was there. Sometimes, you get really great insight that you hadn’t thought of before.
Have you ever sat down with a friend, and started talking about something that you’re struggling with or feeling confused about? And you know how sometimes that friend barely has to say anything at all, and before you know it, you’re starting to unravel your thoughts and finding clarity? Writing can do the same thing; and even more so when it’s about a subject that you might feel uncomfortable discussing with anyone else. Because the paper won’t judge you. It will just lovingly accept your words and reflect them back to you to help you find clarity.
I dare you to try it.
Go to a dollar store, buy yourself a cheap notebook, and write, just a little bit, every day, for a week. Just one week. 7 days. That’s all.
And then come back here, and tell me how it went, how you felt after you wrote.
Do it!
Well, you don’t have to. But how bad do you want to feel good? How bad to you want to find clarity? How bad do you want your life to begin moving in the direction of your Destination?
I love you no matter what you decide. And I am here for you.
– Mel