You hate your job. You’re certainly not alone in this. But what if you could find some measure of joy, or even simple content, in the work you do, even as you look for the kind of work you really want to be doing?

There’s this guy where I used to work – let’s call him Dave – that I really liked talking to. Over the years, I’ve gotten to know him a bit, and every so often we’d meet in the hallway and I’d ask how his wife is doing, how’s the baby, or I’d ask something about his favourite pastime.

In the last couple of years, I’ve barely seen Dave around anymore, and when I did, he was always busy moving from one meeting to another or going somewhere in a hurry. One time, he did slow down long enough for us to chat and hoping to help bring his stress levels down, I asked him if he wanted to join our lunchtime meditation group. He said:

“You want me to take 10 minutes to meditate? I don’t even have time to go to the bathroom”.

That really struck me. We worked in the same organization. I’d heard that some areas were struggling with workload but I’d wondered just how bad it really was. I thought, if he felt like he didn’t even have time to stop for a bathroom break, let alone eat, or take a few minutes to breathe, it must be really bad over there.

This seemed to go on for a while. Every time I’d see him in the halls, his response was always something similar. One day, I asked him “Why don’t you find something else? Why don’t you leave?”

He just shrugged his shoulders and mumbled something about having tried unsuccessfully in the past. Now, he just seemed resolved to his fate.

Here I was, passionately working to make the organization better, striking up conversations around mental health to work on eliminating the stigma, sharing tips on coping with stress, teaching and leading meditation groups. And there he was, resisting all of it, chuckling skeptically every time I suggested an activity he could take part in that I felt might be helpful.

So I wondered: Were we not doing enough? Were we taking the wrong approach? What else could we do to help people like Dave?

And then I realized, he just believes that this is the way it’s supposed to be.

It’s not ok to hate your job

Why is there a common belief that it’s normal to hate your job?

Many are beginning to break from the mold, but many more are still just clocking in and out of their job because they’ve been taught to believe that this is just the way it’s supposed to be.

We grew up with phrases like “If it were fun, it wouldn’t be work.”

To people like Dave, work is a necessary thing we have to do in order to bring money in, so we can do the things we like on the weekends, and on the odd week-long vacations.

The problem is, as I watched Dave over time, I thought:

if he keeps going at this rate, his health will fail him, his wife will leave him, and/or he will burn out, most likely with a side of depression.

He was already gaining weight and he’d mentioned a few minor health issues. The spark that I used to see in his eyes was a distant memory. The fun-loving, smiling friend I used to know was just a mere shadow of his former self.

You want to know what the impact of hating your job is? That’s it. The longer you stay at a job you hate, the more the pieces of your life will fall apart.

What to do about the job you hate

For some of you, I already know I’m preaching to the choir. But here’s something I’d like to propose that I don’t think is being talked about a whole lot:

You can quit the job you hate, but no matter where you go next, you will always take yourself with you.

In other words, the attitude with which you approach your work is everything.

It’s easy to think that we’ll be happy once we’re in a job we like and we’ve found success; but happiness doesn’t emerge as a result of being successful in our careers and in our life. Years of positive psychology research have found that it’s actually the other way around.

“When we pursue happiness, we are actually more likely to become more successful.” – Shawn Achor (Big Potential)

Happiness isn’t a “nice to have” luxury we get at work.

What if you took a look at the work you do, took a deep breath, let go of your preconceived notions and beliefs about it, and made an effort to look for the few things you DON’T hate about it?

What if you took a look at the people you work with and instead of focusing on all the things that are negative about them, you looked for things that you can appreciate about them?

It doesn’t have to be big things. And maybe you have to get creative about it. Maybe you’re a janitor and you feel like that work is beneath you. Can you appreciate that it’s the kind of work that keeps you on your feet and moving around rather than sitting down at a desk all day, which feels like death-by-boredom to you?

Maybe you’re a data entry clerk, and you’re doing mindless data entry all day. Can you appreciate the fact that it liberates your brain to allow creative ideas to flow through?

Maybe you work with people who gossip about everyone all day. Can you look past the gossip and consider how good they are at their job? Can you appreciate the fact that even though Nancy is the office gossip queen she’s amazing at digging out valuable information, which populates the important presentation you need to make to upper management next week?

How to love what you do

1.    Show up like a champ

You might know that I was demoted into an admin position 3 years ago, after having been doing project work for 6 years. I’d done admin work before, but this wasn’t even the interesting stuff I’d gotten to do then. It was borderline secretarial work. That job was SO beneath me.

So how did I handle it until I could get out?

I decided that if I was going to be an admin, I was going to be the best damn admin I could be.

As Marie Forleo would say, I showed up like a champ, every single day. I did everything that was asked of me right away. And when I was finished, I would ask my Director and her managers for more.

Then I began to ask what more I could do to help. I figured if I was going to be here, I might as well make myself useful.

My boss knew of my demotion situation. She knew I didn’t like this job. But soon, she became impressed with how professionally I was taking it all.

2.    Connect with your colleagues

The other thing I did was, rather than doing what came easily to me and shut myself in, stay in my cubicle and not talk to anyone, I started taking part in our group’s social activities. I took a few minutes to strike up conversations with my colleagues about their work, their social life, their passions.

I connected with them, individually, and soon, I didn’t just feel like I was part of a team; it felt like I was part of a family.

The people in my team came to know that I was the one to go to when they needed help. And my boss started working on generating projects that she thought would be more interesting for me.

I didn’t know it then, but people began to talk. Managers took notice. Within a few months, I was offered a new position within the organization that seemed tailor-made for me.

Focus on the positive and soon you will see opportunities where there were only closed doors

Rather than focusing on yourself, and how shitty your situation is, try focusing on the positive things that you can find. Even the tiniest things will do! No matter how you feel about your work, by showing up like a champ, you not only train your brain to look for and focus on the positive things around you, you create opportunities for yourself, often without even realizing it.

Then, the more you help those around you, the more your own potential for opportunities will grow.

After all, what manager doesn’t want a helpful, hard-working person on their team?

And when you do find another job, perhaps even at a different organization, and you take yourself with you, you will find that you not only like who you’ve become, but you will quickly become the superstar in your new office, that others will want to model themselves after.

Now THAT is a good way of loving what you do.

What about you?

Do you hate your job? Are you looking for something different because you’re dissatisfied at work?

What can you do, starting today, to help yourself begin to enjoy the work you do? Have you tried other strategies? If so, share them in the comments below so others can benefit!